July 5, 2013 by kruckr
On July 1, 2013 at approximately 11:15 p.m., our world became exponentially smaller. Things that mattered before (movies, books, fashion, weekend plans) seem completely insignificant now. In the three days he’s been in this world, Henry has completely consumed me. Everyone tries to prepare you, to tell you what this is going to feel like. But, there are no words to express this feeling. This pure elation that comes with snuggling him, smelling him, kissing him, watching him … I cannot get enough. That feeling is what I hold onto when I have to leave his side each day as we depart the NICU. The hospital doesn’t place any restrictions on when we can see our boy, but the one rule they enforce is – no ADULTS sleeping in the NICU. It’s that rule alone that forces me home at the end of each day.
Snuggled in his sleeper, ready for nighttime
We have no set time when we will be able to bring him home yet. I don’t think it would be fair for the doctor’s or specialists to try to speculate in that regard, but I’m hoping it will be in a week or so. His goal is to be able to bottle feed 2 oz. of milk within a half hour and right now, he’s averaging about a 1/2 oz. in that time period. The combination of his heart and his genetic condition create low energy and poor muscle tone, so his favorite past time these days is sleeping. He’s getting stronger and more alert each day. So I believe it’s only a matter of time before his goal is achieved.
Rocking the pacifier … working on those jaw muscles
Dan and I celebrated our independence day today by giving him his first bath – which he tolerated very well. And, I LOVE LOVE LOVE his post-bath smell. It’s amazing!! I also got to see him smile for the first time today. Also, a truly wonderful feeling.
Our days will center around the NICU for the next foreseeable future. If I can manage my sleep and energy I know that this is the best place for him right now. His nurses and doctors are awesome and he is well cared for. However, when I’m tired I become pure emotion and hormones. That’s when my amazing husband steps in to hold me up. I don’t think I could have asked for a better match for me or a better father for Henry.
First time holding his son after delivery
Good night! Time to sleep. Off to see our boy first thing in the morning!!